Wednesday, October 19, 2011

Onesies That are The Twosies

One of the first things I did when I found out I was having a little one was go out and look for unique and cool onesies for the little one to rock. Much to my disappointment, most of the clothing out there for little ones is not that cool. I get it, little boys like puppies and little girls are princesses, but what about introducing them to the important things like Star Wars, cartoon characters and the 1989 cast of Saturday Night Live? Not wanting to raise my child in a world where he knows more about Elmo then Elvis, I took the situation into my own hands. I began to make my own onesies.

Here is what you need to make yourself some of the coolest onesies in town (and yes, I just wrote that):

  • Iron On Transfer Paper: There are multiple companies that sell this. You can pick it up at any office supply store or major retailer.
  • Medium to High Resolution Images: This is where the fun starts. What are you into? Star Wars? Calvin and Hobbes? Dungeons and Dragons? Classic Movie Monsters? The Golden Girls? Whatever you are into can be found on the Interwebs. Use Google Image search to look for your area of interest. I recommend sticking with medium to large images (lower left hand side of the results). You will need to click on the image. It will go to the site and showcase the image in a pop-up box. You will want to click on full-size image. You now can right mouse click on this image and save to your hard drive. I recommend that you keep a folder for these images because they start to take over your hard drive.

    So now that you have that ideal image of Estelle Getty, you need to do some basic photo manipulation. (Disclaimer: It is wrong to utilize copyrighted images and we at Stunt Dad do not recommend doing it. Do you know how much money you are taking out of Estelle Getty's mouth right now? What did she do to you? Sure she was mean to Blanche, but you would be to. She was a floozy. But if you should want to proceed further we can't stop
  • Photo Manipulation: One of the keys to this exercise is that you will need to save the image reversed (mirrored). The best way to articulate why is to ask you to lift your palm, take a pen and write Stunt Dad Rules on it (shameless self promotion), now take your hand place it on a piece of paper. What you will see that your legally binding commitment to Stunt Dad is now reversed. When you take a standard picture and print it on iron transfer paper, you will be ironing the back side of the page that you printed on. This will mean that you will need to use either a software like PhotoShop, an online tool like Pixlr or even PowerPoint or Word (click on the image, hold down shift and drag it to the right, it should flip the image) to take the image and reverse it.
  • A printer with color ink: For some reason our printer is constantly out of ink. I blame the Illuminati, but I can't prove it. Until then, I always make sure to check the printer ink before starting any major project.
  • Finally, and maybe the most important, a wife that is willing to show you how to use the iron. I am not allowed near anything that can set the house on fire, so I have to ask my wife. If you fall into that camp, be nice, ask your wife and have her follow the instructions on the iron on transfer package.
Remember to flip the image (mirror). You will be really angry when you realize you wasted an iron-on with an image that is not reversed.

Good luck and thank you for being a friend. We have now traveled down a road and back again. Your heart is true. Your a pal and a confidant. And if you through a party and invited everyone you knew, you would see that the biggest gift would be from me and (tearing up) the card would say thank you for being a friend.

Sorry about that, I had to get it out. Here are a couple of examples of the technique perfected:

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