We have lots of debates and discussions here at Stunt Dad HQ. What's your favorite this? What is the best that? Today's debate focuses in on something that is very near and dear to our hearts...music. The truth is that if we weren't Stunt Dads, we would probably be a band. Stunt Ben was actually a member of a rock band for a couple of years. Uncle Terry is known to frequent many of the local blues and jazz haunts on a regular basis. Pete use to rock a mean bong. And whether he wants you to know it or not, Stunt Chad was a performing show choir member in high school (before the kids in Glee made that kind of thing cool).
The question we are trying to answer is what are the 5 bands that you must share with your children by the time they are 5 years old? It's a Dad's job to provide roots to grow and wings to fly (sorry, we have been listening to a lot of Pink Floyd lately). When it comes to music before 5, it's time to focus on the roots. Do it right and they will discover the love, joy, and passion music can bring. Do it wrong, and you have a long 13 years of listening to the latest Disney pop star robots ahead of you. So what 5 bands would you share? Here are the ground rules:
- You have to include the artists entire library. You can't say "I would include Artist X, but only up until Album X." No can do, my friend. It's all or nothing.
- You can go back in time as far as you like. If you believe Bach is core to a healthy foundation, then wind up the time machine and bring him forward.
- You can't include the Beatles. They are a given and we expect more imagination from you.
Stunt Chad
Ben Folds
For me, one of the most important things in music is the ability to tell a story with lyrics. Ben Folds is probably one of the most prolific singer songwriters today. Using primarily just a piano, he paints elaborate scenes and engaging scenarios. Here is an example of the beauty of lyrics:
I don't get many things right the first time
In fact, I am told that a lot
Now I know all the wrong turns, the stumbles and falls
Brought me here
And where was I before the day
That I first saw your lovely face?
Now I see it everyday
And I know
That I am
I am
I am
The luckiest
Some of my favorite songs are "The Luckiest", "Fred Jones Part 2" and Annie Waits. I believe that if I can share the beauty of artistic storytelling, they will have a better ability to judge the difference between style and substance.
Foo Fighters
Most great music starts with great drums and there is probably no band that does it better than the Foo Fighters. Their music is the definition of hard and loud...but at the same time, they are creating some of the most unique and memorable hooks in the history of rock. Most loud rock music is loud and dumb, but I dare you to listen to All My Life, Everlong or Best of You and try not to want to take on the world. I think that if I can get my little ones to understand that loud doesn't haven't to mean lame...I will have done my work here.
Beastie Boys
I think the lesson here for the little ones is that you have to fight for your right to party. Picture this three skinny white boys breaking through in early rap music and becoming one of the most innovative musicians in the industry. I am sure that it was not easy. And I am sure that they had their fair share of adversity in getting to where they are. So what does this mean for the kiddies, if you are passionate about something and you invest yourself in being great at something...then it doesn't matter what stands in your way. It also doesn't hurt that they have created some of the most funky and memorable beats. If you are going to expose your kids to rap, you couldn't do better than the Beastie Boys.
Elton John
The Rocket Man is a walking talking showman that has created a wide range of hits throughout the years. His ability to create passionate music that connects at your core is unlike any other artist. Just so you know, I am catching a lot of s#$% for including Sir Elton in my five, but I challenge you to listen to the following songs in a row and not sing along to almost all of them:
Goodbye Yellow Brick Road
Your Song
Tiny Dancer
Don't Let The Sun Go Down on Me
I'm Still Standing
Rocket Man
I Want Love
Black Sabbath
At the age of 8 years old, my friend Mike Hammond and I were going through his uncle's closet and came upon the scariest looking thing I had ever seen, the Black Sabbath Paranoid album. We had no idea what it was, but we knew that it was not something our parents would want us listening to...so we immediately put it on the turntable. What we heard next was the most influential 40 minutes of music I have ever heard. The heavy bass line of Iron Man, the wailing voice of Ozzy on War Pigs, the trippy ambiance of Planet Caravan, and the ridiculous guitar solos were life changing. I had no idea what we had really just listened to, but I knew that I had to hear it again. Throughout the years, Black Sabbath became my gateway drug to other heavy metal artists ranging from Metallica to Pantera, but there will always be a special place in my heart for the Heavy Metal Kings of the 1970's. If I can share this rebellious feeling with my little ones, then I know that they will make the right choices when presented with the choices between metal purity and merely posers.
Stunt Pete
I want my children to make their own decisions in life, but I do feel like I need to point them in the right direction. Such as telling them not to touch the stove so they won't burn themselves, not to stand on furniture so they don't break their neck, or not to drink out of the toilet so they don't get herpes. I'm planning on using that same train of thought when it comes to sharing music with them: tell them what artists not to listen to. My "5 by 5" edition consists of artists (and rules) that my kids are not to listen to so they don't listen to crappy music.
Paris Hilton (Don't listen to "actresses")
Paris Hilton and the rest of the actresses-turned-singers are proof that it takes talent to make music. The music industry should put a ban on any actress who wants to attempt a singing career. Ironically, most of these same aspiring crossover women also have sex tapes floating around the internet (Hilton, Kim Kardashian, Heidi Montag, etc.), and you know what they say? Everything comes in 3s. In this case, they can't act, can't sing, and can't $%$@.
New Kids on the Block (Don't listen to boys who don't play instruments)
This group opened the door for 25 year old boys who have never touched an instrument to make millions of dollars by wearing flappy pants, dancing around the stage in luminous tops and spikey hair, and sounding like someone clipped their balls. This is not music. This is a record producer who is trying to make money off of teenage girls who didn't have a father giving them a heads up on what does—and doesn't—qualify as music.
Nickelback (Don't listen to music that never changes)
Every song Nickelback has ever produced sounds exactly the same. I can't name a single song because there is no differentiation in their music. It's like a bowl full of mush. It doesn't taste like anything, it doesn't look like anything, and by the end of it, you're completely revolted.
Korn (Don't listen to fake metal)
Korn has a song titled "Fake"—oh, the irony! They pretend to be metal, but sound more like hip hop or goth rock. The point is that they are everything, but not one thing. Sure, they pioneered Nu Metal, but guess what? Nu Metal is dead. It lasted just longer than Boy Bands, because no one wants to hear six different styles of music crammed into a 3-minute song. Plus, they opened the door for Limp Bizkit, so excuse me while I go throw up now.
Creed (Don't listen to rockers who sing Jesus ballads)
I don't hate God, and I don't mind people praising God, in fact, my Tim Tebow jersey should be arriving in the mail this week. But unless you're in church, the story of Abraham doesn't need to be playing on non-Christian based radio and put into the same category as Pearl Jam. Groups that want to croon about Noah and all of his animals, go for it! Just do it on Sundays or in Tennessee.
Stunt Ben
My 5 by 5 is tainted slightly because I would normally consider some of the artist already on my fellow Stunt Dad's lists. So here are the five I would choose outside of the ones already mentioned. Fortunately in the real world, I can play as much music for my boys as I want and I don't have to limit their exposure to just 5. But if I had to...
Bob Marley
There are only a few groups or people that fathered and defined their genre in addition to making great music that will last for generations. W.C. Handy, Elvis, Iron Maiden, Van Halen, Iggy Pop, Run DMC, Louis Armstrong, Jimmie Rodgers are a few that come to mind, but interestingly enough these icons of their genre's are in many ways confined to their genre's. That is, there are few Iron Maide fans that are not heavy metal fans. Few Iggy Pop fans that are not Punk fans. Few W.C. Handy fans that are not blues fans. But one artist comes to mind that not only defined a genre, moved people, made change, and gave hope to his listeners. Bob Marley is celebrated from reggae fanatics, but also spend 90 minutes in a sports bar, listen to a set of jazz, check out a few rap albums, soul, blues or pop, and you are sure to find Marley's music and influence. There is something about Marley that transcends genre, and it is a great introduction into a wealth of talent and overall great music.
Jimi Hendrix
I love the guitar and so it goes without saying that Jimi Hendrix is a must before 5. There were lots of guitarists re-vamping the blues at the time, but Jimi pushed the guitar and rock and roll into a new direction. At the same time his influence on effects and production would change the way guitarists per-sued the instrument forever. I wouldn't necessarily focus on Voodoo Chile or Foxy Lady, there will be plenty of exposure to those greats as they get older. But instead I would play Remember the Mockingbird for the effortless way in which Jimi serves as his own rhythm and lead guitarist at the same time while singing, Little Wing for being one of the greatest pieces of modern guitar work in existence and then the transformation from Dylan's All Along the WatchTower to Hendrix's rendition—which in my mind is the greatest remake or cover ever done.
Nick Drake
I still remember the day a friend handed me Pink Moon. Even though I had studied music for years, played for years and performed for years, I felt like I was listening to music for the first time. There is a a powerful intimacy to the album that puts you sitting right next to Nick Drake. It's soothing but mysterious at the same time, his voice is hypnotic and the guitar playing is the exact opposite of some folky d-bag strumming chords. The best part about Pink Moon is that it is the perfect bedtime album that simultaneously makes your kid cooler than that Elmo listening turd around the corner.
Queen
Want your kid to know how to Rock? Queen is more than loud, more than high-pitched screaming, more than rattling guitar and piercing guitar solos...Queen takes it to a new level with their precise orchestration, Freddy Mercury's theatrical and intense vocal delivery and some of the most memorable songs that will ever be played. Queen is also awesome for kids. The Stomp Stomp CLAP of We Will Rock You will have them marching around the house all day. I don't care who you are, sing along to Bohemian Rhapsody and they will drop to the floor laughing. And the content is relevant...has anyone seen my bicycle?
Thelonious Monk
While all my selections are personal, I at least have pretended there was good reason to place them in my 5 before 5. But for Thelonious Monk, I won't even try to give any other reason but that he's a favorite of mine. Round Midnight haunts me often and is, in my opinion, one of the greatest melodies ever composed. And Thelonious certainly was efficient in his talent. Consider that he is the second most recorded jazz composer after Duke Ellington. The difference is that Ellington wrote over 1,000 tunes and Monk only 70. They were a damn good 70.
Uncle Terry
So there I was… sitting at the bar last Wednesday… 1.30 AM… the band was between sets… and the previous hour of heavy-hitting drum beats and back-breaking guitar riffs reminded me that I had to submit my 5 by 5 list of top bands/musical artists to the Stunt Dad blog. Filled with a new found burst of commitment and responsibility to you, the reader, I put down a few notes on my bar napkin – bands to include, albums to reference, songs to mention—you get the picture. But when I awoke the next morning at noon, I couldn't make much sense of any of my writings, other than the name and phone number of a girl scrawled in the top left corner (win).
Nonetheless, I managed to regroup, collect my thoughts, and throw together my 5 by 5 list. Now keep in mind, I'm writing this from the perspective of an uncle. Sure, dads are gonna want to expose their kids to music that they think is important and cool—but let's be honest—there may be a tendency to play it a little safe. After all, you may not really be comfortable with the mental picture of your kids playing Led Zeppelin's "Stairway to Heaven" backwards to hear the backmasked phrase "Here's to my sweet Satan." Cuz let's remember, you're the one who's gonna have to deal with the fallout from that mind-blowing experience. Exposing your kids to secret Satanic messages in classic rock anthems—that's not the job of a father—but it is the job of a really cool uncle! But then again, I don't want to be edited out of this posting. So…
Maybe I'll lay out a path of influential groups and artists that will serve as anchors for a youngster's musical growth. I've decided to structure my recommendations in three ways: The Chronology (basically older to more recent), The Genre (root music through more contemporary groups), and The Kid Factor (what about them, in particular, makes them great for kids). So let us begin.
The Mills Brothers
I'm sure many of you are asking, "Who are the Mills Brothers?" Well this early 20th century best-selling jazz/pop/folk vocal group ran the gamut (and are great for kids). For starters, their songs are kid friendly as far as lyrics go. Their wonderful four-part harmonies are a great teaching tool to help young ones understand how music and songs are constructed. And best of all, they don't just sing lyrics, they vocalize instruments. Yup. There you are, listening along, waiting for the instrumental solos after the chorus, and then it happens—the Mills Brothers imitate the sounds of a tuba, trumpets, and even a trombone. Trust me, this is pretty magical for a little kid to hear. It's fun—and they themselves will want to try to make those instrument noises too. Not only that, but your shorty will get a solid education in American standards from the 20s through the Post-War Years.
(apologies to Hank Williams, The Carter Family, Les Paul, King Oliver)
Miles Davis
So we've got the kiddos started on early root music. Good. Next, we need to continue on to the evolution of jazz. And while it's tough to leave out giants like Louis and Trane and Diz and Bird, the best pick of all has to be Miles. Why do I say this? Well, Miles has the greatest span of any jazz artist: a product of the musical crossroads of America in the early 20th century (St. Louis/East St. Louis), filling in with a touring big band that included members Charlie Parker and Dizzy Gillespie, hit up the Juilliard School in New York, teamed back up with Bird and Diz and the bebop movement, basically creates the cool school, journeys into jazz fusion, and finishes with jazz hip-hop fusion. Even our very own Stunt Ben wrote an article about the soothing sensation of Miles' Kind of Blue album on children. Plus, how many guys can take a show tune like "Surrey with the Fringe On Top" as well as a Cyndi Lauper pop song, "Time After Time" and turn them both into jazz classics. For the range in styles as well as the example of genius, you can't go wrong with Miles.
(apologies to Louis, Duke, Trane, Diz, Bird, Mingus, Monk, and Wynton)
Chuck Berry
Another product of the musical melting pot of St. Louis, Chuck put it down. He defined the sound. He made the kids dance 'round and 'round. It begins and ends with Chuck Berry. His guitar sound is the foundation of 90% all ax men who picked up an electric guitar after 1955. But most importantly, his music has that rocking' boogie bounce in its backbone that will make your kids shake, jump, and shout (credit his piano man, Johnnie Johnson, as the inspiration)! Little kids LOVE dancing around to Chuck's tunes. Just try putting on any of his classic tunes—"Johnnie B. Goode", "Maybellene", "Rock and Roll Music"—see what happens. But also, check out other mainstays like "Reelin' and Rockin'", "Sweet Little Rock and Roller", "Beautiful Delilah", "Nadine", and how can you go wrong with the best rock holiday tune of all, "Run Rudolph Run". It's high energy and high enjoyment.
(apologies to Muddy Waters, Johnny Cash, Roy Orbison, Little Richard, The Killer, The King, B.B. King, Albert King, Freddy King)
Jackie Wilson
This one is a little tricky. I thought about of a lot of different people who could fit well in this spot. Then I settled on someone who was inspired by groups like The Mills Brothers, Louis Jordan, and Diz. So the one who fits it best is Jackie Wilson. For one, the likes of Elvis Presley, Michael Jackson, James Brown, and Lenny Williams credit him as a major influence in their careers. And, he recorded some of the greatest R&B songs of the 20th century. Songs like "Lonely Teardrops", "Baby Workout", "(Your Love Keeps Lifting Me) Higher and Higher". If you want to play some soulful music for your little tyke, you could do much worse than putting on some Jackie Wilson. Plus, if you and your child search for some of his videos on youtube, you can watch one heck of a mover.
(apologies to Brother Ray, Sam Cooke, Sly, Parlament and Funkadelic, Lenny Williams, Prince, and Michael Jackson)
Led Zeppelin
So I've already shown my cards a bit—I mentioned the greatest rock band in the history of the universe, Led Zeppelin. So let's just start there. Robert Plant, Jimmy Page, John Bonham, John Paul Jones—Gods of rock. They are the perfect mix of root, blues, R&B, and rock music. Plant—name a better more raw vocalist out there. Page—every riff he writes and plays is unique and unlike any other, giving each song its own identity. Bonzo… let's put it this way—who among us hasn't spent a Saturday afternoon at a bar with total strangers ranking the top rock drummers of all time, at some point, seeing the group fracture right around that area of the Keith Moon/Mitch Mitchell group and the guy that first mentions Neal Peart—but no one dares place anyone above John Bonham. And John Paul Jones—aside from being a great naval officer and Revolutionary War hero in a previous life, he put down some of the greatest bass lines and shifting time signatures in rock history! And how 'bout the album art: burning blimps, crazy illustrations, naked chicks on rocks, crazy symbols, cool typography, die-cut apartment buildings, freaking Icarus… solid stuff. But that's not all…
Just picture it! Imagine little Billy standing in front of his kindergarten class for show and tell with an old Techniques turntable and dad's vinyl copy of Led Zeppelin IV. For one, the "old" technology is already a great show and tell piece. But then, little Billy starts spinning that LP backwards… "Stairway to Heaven"… kids would FREAK! Think of the power little Billy will have over that class from that point on. He'll be a legend. You want your kid to be a legend, don't you?
(apologies to CCR, The Band, The Allman Brothers, Jimi Hendrix, Neil Diamond, The Rolling Stones, and Jay-Z)
So Stunt Dad Nation, what do you think? What are your 5 by 5? Let us know in the comments. Also, if you like the site, please tell your friends or click the Like button in the upper right hand corner.
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