Munch's Hunches: NFL Divisional Playoffs

From coast to coast, Tim Tebow has become a phenomenon, and America is cashing in. Church attendance is up, Jockey underwear sales have never been higher, and early buzz coming out of Darling Angels Daycare is that they anticipate 2012 revenue to reach an all-time high, thanks in large part to my son, Munch. Last Sunday, the 20-month Munch organized a "Tebowl-a-rama" to raise money for a new big screen at Darling Angels. With more than 200 parents showing up, not only did they secure enough funds to purchase a 100" projector TV, but Munch's out-of-the-box "Tebowchickawowow" game generated more than $50,000. The game featured a shirtless Tim Tebow look-a-like conducting private dances for each of the ladies who donated $1 per every yard the real Tim Tebow threw. Only Munch's combination of football foresight and marketing magic could have predicted what happens when you string together a group of moms, a buff, spikey hair 20 year old, and a quarterback who ended up throwing for a career-high 319 yards. The owners of daycare are extremely excited for Saturday night's "Tebowchelorette," where 50 local men (who each donated $100) will compete for the opportunity to go on a date with a girl who once went on a date with Tim Tebow at the University of Florida. With all of the cash that Munch is bringing into Darling Angels, even the resident hottie, 2-year old Vanessa Calloway, has taken notice, "He's got the savvy of James Dean, the business sense of Jay-Z and the street smarts of Phil Hellmuth. What more could a girl want?"

The Saturday Game
Match-Up: New Orleans (14-3) at San Francisco (13-3)
Preview: Alex Smith suffers "Tebowel movement" in practice. After throwing a long touchdown pass during Friday's practice, 49er quarterback Alex Smith mocked Tim Tebow—and paid the price. As Smith got down on knee and raised his fist to his forehead, a large rumble was heard throughout the indoor practice facility, followed by the quarterback sh*tting himself on the 40 yard line. "The entire building seemed to shake, and that's when I saw it," said linebacker Patrick Willis. "I've never seen dookie actually seep through pants before. He made a real mess of himself." Smith was carted off the field and taken to a local hospital, where, upon examination, he was diagnosed with Irritable Tebowel Syndrome.
Munch's Hunch: Saint Go Marching In!
Stunt Dad Diatribe: New Orleans have been coasting, looking unstoppable for the past month. However, they are not an outdoor stadium team. And Candlestick is not an easy place to play this year, as the Niners are 7-1. SF will also bring a defense unlike any Drew Brees has seen this season, and Patrick Willis has personally guaranteed that Brees will not throw for more than 300 yards. Look for the Niners to shut down the Saints running attack and get a big defensive touchdown in this week's Fog Bowl. Niners gold rush Saints 24-21.

The Sunday Game
Match-Up: Houston (10-6) at Baltimore (12-4)
Preview: Joe Flacco give a Tebowjob to young fan. He was handsome. He had a great smile. And, he was 18. Which was good enough for Ravens quarterback, Joe Flacco, as he proceeded to give the University of Maryland freshman a Tebowjob. The man, who preferred to remain anonymous, was forced against at all, directed to close his eyes, and stick out his hands. Flacco then proceeded to start shoving communion wafers in his mouth and had the college student recite the Lord's prayer until he admitted that Tim Tebow does belong in the NFL. It's refreshing to see that these NFL quarterbacks really do stick together.
Munch's Hunch: Quote the Raven, More More More!
Stunt Dad Diatribe: I don't like TJ Yates especially, but I love Arian Foster and its impossible not to love Andre Johnson. Plus, they are one of two teams (Steelers) to actually have a better defense than the Ravens. Joe Flacco is a disaster waiting to happen every game, and Sunday will show a colossal meltdown from the inconsistent QB. Look for the Texans to shut down the Ravens in this week's Bowl. Texans lasso Ravens 27-23.

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Munch's Hunches: NFL Playoffs Preview

For Christmas this year, Munch didn't ask for nudie playing cards. He didn't ask for an automatic card shuffler. And, surprisingly, he didn't ask for The World's Greatest Blackjack Book (which he just went gaga over when we watched The Hangover). Instead, my 20-month old son asked for a plane ticket. A plane ticket to the biggest week of sports in the history of the Big Easy. According to my gambling, sports-nut of a son, this was "a once in a lifetime opportunity." Perhaps I should have put my foot down given that he's not even 2 years old and probably shouldn't be traveling across the country by himself, but he looked just too darn cute in his backward Hornets cap, Saints onesie, and Tiger booties. To put me over the edge, he showed me his itinerary.

• Tuesday Sugar Bowl: #13 Michigan vs. # 17 Virginia Tech (Superdome)
• Wednesday NBA Basketball: New Orleans Hornets host Philadelphia 76ers (New Orleans Arena)
• Friday NBA Basketball: New Orleans Hornets host Denver Nuggets (New Orleans Arena)
• Saturday NFC Wildcard Round: New Orleans Saints host Detroit Lions (Superdome)
• Monday BCS Championship: #1 LSU vs. #2 Alabama (Superdome)

I had to admit, I would be a real jerk of a father to not let my son attend a sporting event line-up like that. So, I did what every dad in that situation would have done. I purchased tickets to each of the games, got him a limo to O'Hare, a ticket in 1st Class, a 7-night stay at the Four Seasons, and handed him my credit card for the week. As excited as he was, I insisted that he return home on Tuesday so that he'd be ready to go back to Darling Angels Daycare on Wednesday morning, 8am sharp. Munch nodded and confidently proclaimed, "By the time I get back, I'm going to have won so much cash that we can buy that daycare and rename it Munch's Angels." What can I say, every kid has their priorities.

However, what Munch also has is vision—evident by a piece of paper I found in his bedroom last night. The paper was titled 2011-12 NFL Playoff Picture and featured a scribbled an analysis of each team's odds to win the Super Bowl.

AFC

• Baltimore Ravens:  The similarities to the 2000 Super Bowl team is uncanny. Tough D? Check. Great RB? Check. Balding, caucasian quarterback? Check.
• Cincinnati Bengals: Rookie AJ Green's quote sums it up perfectly, "I'm just happy to be here."
• Denver Broncos: One win will give Timmer respect and the starting job next year, one loss will give Denver respect and Timmer will be shitcanned next year.
• Houston Texans: Only 1 rookie QB has ever won the Super Bowl. His name is Kurt Warner and he's a Hall of Famer. Sorry Texan fans, TJ Yates will never be heading to Canton. 
• New England Patriots: never bet against Tom Brady, unless his defense ranks 30th and his offensive coordinator becomes the poor sap who takes the Penn State job. Gulp, on both accounts. 
• Pittsburgh Steelers: Unless he's playing a team that consists of 20-year old women, Roethlisberger and Co. won't be beating anyone in this year's playoffs

NFC

• Atlanta Falcons: They have an offense built for points, a defense that can't cover wide receivers, and they will need to beat 3 quarterbacks who threw for nearly or more than 5,000 yards (Manning, Brees, Rodgers). 
• Detroit Lions: The reward for a humiliated franchise that has finally made the playoffs for the first since 1999? Flying 3 hours to be humiliated by Drew Brees. 
• Green Bay Packers: Their offense is great, but their rushing game isn't. Their pass defense isn't horrible, but they will face Drew Brees. And, the only thing harder than winning the Super Bowl, is repeating as Super Bowl Champs. 
• New Orleans Saints: Number 1 offense. Number 1 offensive live. Number 1 quarterback. Defense wins championships, but this offense will win the Super Bowl. 
• NY Giants: Only 2 teams have gone 9-7 and reached the Super Bowl. And, both of them lost. 
• San Francisco 49ers: A defense good enough to shut out any team they face. An offense bad enough to shut themselves out against any team they face.

Munch's Superbowl Hunch: Saints 34 - Ravens 24


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Munch's Hunches: NFL Week 17

NFL Week 17. One of the most exciting weeks of the year. Pro Bowlers are selected or snubbed. Playoffs are on the line. Players are giving everything they have to reach their incentive bonuses are on the line. And for Munch, it becomes a real free for all. A final week where anything goes, nothing is off limits, and nothing is too sacred. Munch will be betting on every prop bet known to man: will Mark Sanchez eat a hotdog on the sidelines? what quarter will Tom Brady get yelled at by his offensive coordinator, who will be the first player to beat the crap out of Kyle Orton when he's caught "Tebowing" on the Broncos' 50 yard line? Yes, its going to be a wild weekend of Munch getting in his last regular season bets, but—truth be told—he an ulterior motive. He is dead set on buying a Fire-Red, 4WD, 6V, H2 Hummer with custom features such as black leather seats, 18" Spinner Rims, an iPad docking station, a cooler that holds 6 juice packs, a pop-up 8" flat screen TV,  and reaches speeds upwards of 50 mph. It costs just over $2,000 and is one of the most obnoxious things I've ever seen. However, the Hummer is not for functionality, it's purely for aesthetics. In fact, it's directly meant to one-up 3 year old Tommy Watkins. Watkins showed up to daycare last week in a sleek, black Escalade which had the angels of Darling Angels oohing and aahing. "It was hot. Tommy was hot. And, I had to drink three glasses of milk because even I was getting hot," blushed 2 year old Vanessa Calloway. When I explained to Munch that showing up older, popular boys to impress pretty girls was exactly the right thing to do, my little guy nodded his head and snorted, "I'm going to make that kid sh*t his pants when I roll my Humvee up in that b*tch." It was one of the most proudest moments of my life. 

The Saturday Stuntline is shaping up as...

The Early Game
Match-Up: Indianapolis (2-13) at Jacksonville (4-11)
Preview: Playoff implications? Negative. 2012 NFL Draft implications? Affirmative. If Indianapolis loses, and they get Andrew Luck. And if Jacksonville wins, they will have Peyton Manning 2.0 tormenting them for the next decade. As the owner of either team, I think it's pretty obvious of what needs to happen. If I'm Colt owner, Jim Irsay, I don't do a thing. I let my team be the crappy 2-13 team they've been all season and watch them get ridiculously smoked, pack my bags, and listen to "Some Guys Have All the Luck" over and over and over on the flight home. On the other hand, if I'm Jaguar owner Wayne Weaver, I resort to threats of violence. Anyone who wants to stretch for a first down, I tell them their legs are gonna be broken in the parking lot after the game. Anyone who wants to score a touchdown, they will be down one family member by sunset.

Munch's Hunch: Love me my MoJo. Go Jags!

Munch's Prop Bet: Number of times Andrew Luck's name gets mentioned in the game (Over/under 15): I'm taking the over. Can't you just hear Chris Collinsworth state, "Next year, Andrew Luck doesn't overthrow that receiver." 
Stunt Dad Diatribe: As unbelievable as it will be, Mr. Weaver won't have the balls to do anything but sit there and watch his team destroy the Colts. If anyone on the Colts thinks its a great idea for them to win this game then someone needs to pull a "Wyatt Earp bitch slap to Billy Bob Thornton" on them in this week's Futures Bowl. Jags maul Colts 27-7.

The Late Game
Match-Up: Baltimore (11-4) at Cincinnati (9-6)
Preview: Now this is why NFL football kicks a$$. Baltimore fighting for the division title and a first round bye in the playoffs. Cincinnati desperate to get back into the playoffs and clinch a wild card with a win. Sadly, it took nearly 2 dozen Bengals to beg, plead, and bribe their fans to come to this game. In fact, running back Cedric Benson promised that he, nor any other Bengal teammate, would get arrested this week to ensure they were at full strength. Andy Dalton even started a website called www.I'mTheOtherWhiteBengalQuarterback.com which emails a picture of Andy, and clearly a "Photoshopped-in" Boomer Esiason, to anyone who registers on the site. And finally, rookie AJ Green took out an ad in the Cincinnati Daily News that read: "Come see your new wide receiver that won't let you down. He won't smoke weed,  he won't' change his name to Uno Ocho, and he won't fall out of a moving pick-up truck." 
Munch's Hunch: Love the desperation coming out of the 'Nati. Go Bengals!
Munch's Prop Bet: Number of times Andy Dalton will be referred to as Mike McQueary (Over/under 1). I'll take the under. Cincy is stayin' classy this weekend. 
StuntDad Diatribe: The offenes are mediocre at best. Both quarterbacks aren't very good. Ray Rice only has 100 more yards than Cedric Benson. And, both teams No. 1 WRs are rookies. Where this game will be fun to watch is on the defensive side of the ball. Have you ever looked at pictures of the Ravens defenders? Terrell Suggs looks like he just got out of prison, Ed Reed looks like he's been living in the woods, and Ray Lewis looks like he just killed someone (uh, wait a second....). These 3 and the rest of their quarterback killin' crew will blow the head off of Andy "The Red Rifle" Dalton in this week's Shotgun Bowl. Ravens cage Bengals 24-21.

The Night Game 
Match-Up: Dallas (8-7) at NY Giants (8-7)

Preview:  What a way to end the regular season. Not only is the NFC East division title and a trip to the playoffs are at stake, but likely some jobs. Apparently Jerry Jones has told head coach Jason Garrett that his job is safe, regardless of the outcome; however, if the Cowboys lose, Jones will make Garrett personally fire the rest of their coaching staff immediately after the game. Dear Mr. Jones: we all knew you were a greedy weasel, but never thought that you were that much of a d*ck! On the flip side, a loss would make the Giants 2-6 in their past 8 games, and force Giants owners, John Mara & Steve Tisch,
to flip a quater as to who gets to "Glengarry Glen Ross" Tom Coughlin: "You had the team. We paid good money. You were 6-2 and just need to close. You couldn't close this year Tom. You couldn't close sh*t. In fact, you are sh*t, Tom. Hit the bricks pal, and beat it, 'cause you are out!" Looking forward to seeing that one on YouTube next week!

Munch's Hunch: A-B-C. A-Always. B-Be. C-Closing. Go Cowboys!
Munch's Prop Bet: In which quarter will Tony Romo start whimpering on the sidelines? I'll take quarter 3 after he's thrown his second interception.
Stunt Dad Diatribe: Jerry Jones built a beautiful stadium. The TVs are gianormous, the urinals are clean with TVs above them, and inside each hotdog wrapper is actually a mini TV so that you can't miss any of the action. However, Jerry Jones built a crappy team, led by Tony Romo himself. He's the Phillip Rivers of the NFC: all flash and no cash. As in money. As in makes the big play. As in advances to and wins the Super Bowl. He'll go down in the record books with a ton of yards, a ton of touchdowns, but also a ton of chokes. The guy can't win the big one, which is why the Giants will take this week's Last Coach Standing Bowl. Giants stomp Cowboys: 38-21. 

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Munch's Hunches: BCS BOWL GAMES

I respect Munch. He is 19 months old & he's a purist. The kid firmly believes that football only plays on Sundays. He won't watch Monday night football. He didn't even watch the games on Thanksgiving Day out of pure spite. And, he has turned his nose down to his puzzle books whenever I tune into my beloved (albeit disappointing) Hawkeyes on Saturday mornings. In fact, his favorite onesie reads "NFL: No Flaw League"on the front and "BCS: Bullsh*t Corrupted Sellouts" on the back. Like I said, he's a purist.

However, we all know Munch has two great passions in his young life: football and gambling. So, he's learned to walk a fine line when it comes to balancing these two. When I first told Munch that the college regular season was over, he waved me off with a "Good riddance." When I told him that Vegas had No. 2 'Bama giving 1 point to No. 1 LSU in the title game, his ears perked up. After some prodding, Munch compromised. "If I'm going to do this, it's going to be on the big boys. Not the Famous Idaho Potato Bowl, the San Diego County Credit Union Poinsettia Bowl, or the Bass Pro Shops (Outdoor World) Bowl presented by the Tracker Marine Group."

Here is your Special Edition: BCS Stuntline:

Rose Bowl presented by VIZIO: #5 Oregon (11-2) vs. #9 Wisconsin (10-2)
Preview: It's absolutely sickening to see the words "presented by VIZIO" included in this bowl game title.  The one thing I actually liked about college football games were the legacy bowls keeping their names, but now, even the "Grandaddy of them All," ranks right up there with the Kraft Fight Hunger Bowl. It's a sad, sad state of affairs when the Tournament of Roses Parade kicks off with a Vizio "Because We Care" float containing live operators fielding calls from angry customers about their crappy products, showcases a marching band playing "Vizio, Vizio" to the tune of "Louie, Louie", and features  more than 400 horses that each have a 65" LCD TV strapped to their saddles.
Munch's Hunch: This is another reason why I hate college football, Oregon's mascot is a damn duck. Go Big Red!
StuntDad Diatribe: The state of Wisconsin has bigger and better things to worry about than this game: the Packers winning the Super Bowl, Ryan Braun busted for juicing, and identifying where the next Democratic senators hideout will be. On the other hand, what does the state of Oregon have? Recent headlines indicate their wolf population is up to 25, their zoo will soon welcome its 50th million visitor, and they were the first state to outlaw blogging by driving. Sadly, this game is the World Series, Super Bowl and NBA Finals wrapped into 60 minutes of another potential disappointment for Oregon. Third time is the charm for Oregon. Ducks quack Badgers 33-24.

Tostitos Fiesta Bowl: #4 Stanford (11-1) vs. #3 Oklahoma State (11-1)
Preview: Do you see what they did here? Mired in scandal all year long, and instead of not getting expelled out of the BCS all together, the Fiesta Bowl actually got rewarded. Rewarded by hosting the best match up other than the title game, including the opportunity to showcase the likely No. 1 pick in the 2012 NFL Draft, Cardinal QB1 Andrew Luck. Great message to send to the kids BCS committee!
Munch's Hunch: Andrew Luck sounds like Mushmouth from Fat Albert. Go Cardinal!
StuntDad Diatribe: "I'm a man! I'm 40!  Still the greatest 3 minutes post-game conference tirade in the history of sports, OSU players have to love playing for Mike Gundy, because Coach will always have their back, no matter how much his players f*ck up on national television in the biggest game of the season against one of their biggest rivals. And we'll see that passion carry over in this shootout of a bowl game. The teams score more than Jerry Sandusky at a Pee Wee Football game (what—too soon?) so if you like touchdowns and think defense doesn't win championships, than tune into this wild west excuse for a football game. Cowboys spur Cardinal 45-41.

Allstate Sugar Bowl: #13 Michigan (10-2) vs. #17 Virginia Tech (11-2)
Preview: Why on Earth two teams are playing in the BCS when they are not even in the top 10 in the country is exactly the reason why college football sucks. Here's the sneak preview: this isn't about football, it's about money. Shocking, I know. Quote from the Sugar Bowl Chief Exploiting Officer, Paul Hoolahan: "We're broke and need bigger schools to make us more money." End quote.
Munch's Hunch: Should I call you Logan, Weapon-X? No, Wolverine! Shnoochy, Shnoochies!
StuntDad Diatribe: If the BCS couldn't be any more pathetic, they go ahead and schedule the worst possible match-up possible. V-Tech got massacred and shot up (what—too soon?) by Clemson in their final regular season game 38-10. And, Michigan couldn't even win their own division, let alone their own conference. However, since I can't name a single Hokie, looks like Denard will run loose. Wolverines gun down Hokies 33-17.

Discover Orange Bowl: #14 Clemson (10-3) vs. #22 West Virginia (9-3)
Preview: I take back what I said about the Sugar Bowl, as this match-up is the single greatest travesty in sports. #23 in the country placing in a BCS game????!!!!! I get there are auto-bids but for God's sake, but they're not even in the top (expletive) 20!! As for Clemson getting in because they won their conference, the ACC is a basketball conference reserved for March Madness and shouldn't even be allowed to field football teams anymore since the Seminoles and Hurricanes realized that recruiting known felons was frowned upon. If more than 10 people in the country watch this pitiful excuse of a football game, then America needs to get their head out of their ass. This bowl should be renamed the Discover A Flaming Piece of Sh*t Bowl presented by Charmin Toilet Paper.
Munch's Hunch: Flaming poop? Now that's a bowl game I'd watch. Anyways, Go Tigers!
StuntDad Diatribe: I think the Preview did a pretty nice job of summing up my thoughts on this game.   Tigers claw Mountainmen 28-10.

Allstate BCS National Championship: #1 LSU (13-0) vs. #2 Alabama (11-1)
Preview: Well, well, well, the BCS actually got something right, if only because they didn't have a choice—so, giving them any credit whatsoever is actually too much. This is what college football should be about: the two best teams playing for the chance to be number 1. Their regular season game was an old-fashion, 1980-reminiscent slugfest with LSU proving that defense does win championships by winning 9-6, and proving field goal kickers actually do matter as the Alabama kicker missed 3 FGs. Its worth noting this same kicker went to the locker room after that particular game and tried to hang himself. Fortunately, he was unable to kick the stool out from under himself. (what—too soon?)
Munch's Hunch: I've always wanted to say this: Roll Tide!
StuntDad Diatribe: This is really the only game worth watching out of the 35 bowl games. No 1. vs. No. 2. SEC powerhouse vs. SEC powerhouse. Saban vs. Miles. Richardson vs. Mathieu. However, if you're looking for another game without a touchdown, sorry to disappoint. I see both offenses getting their acts together, but Les Miles using a few tricks plays to maintain their perfect season. Tigers pounce Tide 24-20. 


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Munch's Hunches: NFL Week 15

One minute you're on top of the world and the next minute some daycare punk is running over you with a lawn mower. Munch had to find this out the hard way after dropping all 3 picks in Week 14. Munch walked into a very quiet Darling Angels daycare on Monday morning, with most of the kids afraid to even drool after Munch's weekend debacle. Instead of waiting for someone to say something he didn't like, Munch changed the conversation before it began. "He started talking about how bad it is at the tables when smoke gets in your eyes," said Trudy Campbell. "And, that's when I asked him how he could still be gambling after, well—you know. Munch looked me square in the eyes and tells me, 'Newsflash kid: the whole world is gambling. As soon as you have to cut down on your gambling, you get labeled with a gambling problem.'" As his father, it's quite refreshing to know that my 18-month old son has life pretty much figured out before he's out of diapers. I was a little worried at how reckless he was when betting on the turn during his last couple of Hold 'Em tournaments or when he'd start hitting on 16 in Mexican Blackjack. I started to think he was some kind of madman, but he's starting to put it together. In just the past few days, he's really polished his approach and is pretty close to becoming the Don Draper of Darling Angels. In fact, when I asked what he loved most about gambling, Munch snorted, "What you call love was invented by toddlers like me, to get cupcakes. You're born alone and you die alone and this world just drops a bunch of rules on top of you to make you forget those facts. But I never forget. I'm living like there's no tomorrow, because there isn't one." See, the kid's done some growing up this week, unlike some of the other kids mentioned below. Apples don't far fall from the tree, I guess.

The Saturday Stuntline is shaping up as...

The Early Game
Match-Up: Seattle (6-7) at Chicago (6-5)
Preview: Sam Hurd's son busted for Smartees. The son of Chicago Bear wide receive Sam Hurd was detained by Lake Forest Police Officers on Friday for allegedly purchasing massive amounts of Smartees with intent to distribute. Ironically, the 9 year old Sam Hurd Jr. doesn't fit the typical drug dealer profile. "He's a model student actually," said 4th grade English Teacher, Ms. Jefferies. "He shows up to school every day, turns in his homework on time, and tries real hard. What he does after 2:30, I really couldn't say." Most of Hurd's classmates expressed similar sentiments, stating that he was very well liked, but few really knew him outside of class. Lake Forest authorities are concerned with a recent trend in grammar schools where students have been crushing up Smartees and then snorting them through plastic straws. "I don't know where he thought to do anything like this. Surely not his parents, his dad plays football for god's sake. I mean, he doesn't actually play, but he's still on the team, I guess. So the million dollar question is: where would a 9 year old ever think to snort candy out of straw? It's ridiculous, just ridiculous," reported Lt. Hank Thames during Friday's press conference. "We've seen everything from nose bleeds to vomiting across 4 counties in the past week. Someone, and I don't know who, needs to sit down with their parents and get to the bottom of this. One of them knows something and isn't talking. I will not rest until I find someone who can be responsible for finding this out." While heading to the bathroom just after the press conference, Lt. Thames picked up the Chicago Tribune Sports section and was proud and shocked to see a) Sam Jr.'s dad was in fact still on the Bears, and b) he had finally made the paper.

Munch's Hunch: Candy, candy, candy. Yum, Yum, Yum. Go Bears!

Stunt Dad Diatribe: Seattle has two impressive wins in a row and is somehow still in contention for a playoff spot, but it will mean beating Chicago first and then a few more miracles over the next couple of weeks. But, Pete Carroll has his team believing because they are not a team that Chicago wants to face right now. The Bears have looked downright pathetic on offense since Cutler and Forte went down. It has gotten worse with each week and last week's loss to the Broncos has likely sealed their fate for the season. Put a fork in the Bears because they are done in this week's Down and Out Bowl. Seahawks Snip Bears 31-21.

The Late Game
Match-Up: New England (10-3) at Denver (8-5)
Preview: John Elway's son busted for Teabagging. Two Denver athletes have been suspended by school administrators for organizing several "squat-downs" in a tribute to the NFL sensation Tim Tebow, who said Friday that while he appreicates their boldness, the students have to obey their elders. "I think if they had good intentions, which it sounds like the boys did, then good for them to have the courage to do something different," the Denver Broncos quarterback said. Denver Prep High School administrators suspended John Elway Jr. and another student this week after organized several "Teabagging" tributes to the NFL star in their school hallway. John Jr. said that he and his friends merely wanted to pay tribute to Tebow as a "role model, leader, and winner. And, that it really didn't have anything to do with humiliating several of the female students and exposing himself to the rest of the student body." Denver Prep School Superintendent Jack Ward said in a statement that the student's actions created a potential safety hazard. "I think it's wonderful that our students look up to sports heroes such as Mr. Tebow, but we can't allow for students to insert their balls into another person's mouth because it creates unsafe situations in school. Students cannot block hallways and prevent other students from getting to class no matter what kind of sexual activity they are conducting."
Munch's Hunch: Only balls being tossed are TDs from Brady to Gronk. Go Pats!
StuntDad Diatribe: Having witness the Mile High Messiah first-hand last week in Denver as they came from behind against my beloved Bears in the last few minutes of the fourth quarter, I've got news for Tom Brady: You can't beat God. And God's muse this year is the Docile Apostle. Last year we know it was Aaron Rodgers, and this year it's T-Bowner. Besides, New England's defense is HORRIBLE and won't be able to stop the Big Tebowski in this week's The Dudes Bowl. Broncos stampede Pats 28-27.

The Night Game Match-Up: Pittsburgh (10-3) at San Francisco (10-3)

Preview: James Harrison's son busted for Concussing. The 8 year old son of Steelers linebacker James Harrison was removed from the Blackwell Bobcats flag football team against rival Campenelli Crusaders for his hit on 7 year old Jenny Olson during Wednesday's game. "Everyone knows that Jenny is a big girl—ok, she's downright huge, especially for a 7 year old—but James Jr. knows that we play flag football to protect the girls who play this game, including Jenny," said Bobcats coach Erik Arnolfsky. "I'm all for a little rough housing, but she ended up with a damn concussion." Apparently, Jenny attempted a QB draw late in the 3rd quarter, which James Jr. read perfectly, and just as Jenny crossed the line of scrimmage, James Jr.'s head flew directly into the girl's chest, just absolutely crushing her in the process. Several players on both teams claimed they heard something snap as Jenny laid on the ground unconscious for a good two minutes before Lenny Bishop, coach of the Crusaders, was able to revive her. James Jr. was immediately thrown out of the game and could only be heard saying, "It is what it is. I plan to appeal." Amazingly, Jenny Olson would return just three plays later, but to no avail as the Bobcats held onto victory 30-24. Hours later Olson was diagnosed with having a concussion. "I stand by my decision to let her play. She seemed fine to me," said Bishop.

Munch's Hunch: Hard hits is football, Go Steelers!
Stunt Dad Diatribe: Ben is hurt. Troy is hurt. Maurkice is hurt. Doesn't make for a good omen. Jim Harbaugh will get his Niners back on track with a huge win over the Steelers. Hopefully, we'll also see Jim channel his inner-self and cold-clock Mike Tomlin after the game in this week's Sons of Anarchy Bowl. Niners gold rush Steelers 17-14.

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Munch's Hunches: NFL Week 14

Just 18 months into life, Munch joins a very impressive club. Babe Ruth. Joe Namath. Muhammed Ali. One called it. One spoke it. One shouted it. These 3 legends all guaranteed victory and backed it up. And after correctly predicting a clean sweep in Week 13, Munch has become the William Wallace of the Midwest daycare community.

• "I heard he's 4 feet tall!" exclaimed Timmy Teigs of Gurnee, IL.
• "Gambles Disney DVDs by the hundreds," said Clark Randshacky of Iowa City, IA.
• "Consumes kids toys with fireballs from his eyes, and bolts of lightning from his diaper," stated Frankie Ruiz of Elkhorn, WI.

Munch's legend is growing each week with every correct pick he makes. It was reported earlier this week that Munch sat down fellow Darling Angels daycarer, Carter Casey, and explained to him the fundamentals of Black Jack. "Munch pointed to Carter's head saying, 'First, learn to use this,' then, he gestured to a deck of Dr. Seuss playing cards stating, 'Then, I'll teach you to use this," accounted Vanessa Calloway.

The Saturday Stuntline is shaping up as...

The Early Game
Match-Up: Atlanta (7-5) at Carolina (4-8)
Preview: Cam Newton kicked off plane for playing Words With Friends. Rookie quarterback made a rookie mistake earlier this week. Carolina Panther quarterback, Cam Newton, was thrown off a Southwest Airlines flight for playing a popular video game called Words With Friends. In a bold statement by Bill Kearney, the Southwest Airlines CEO appeared outraged saying, "Betty Sylvester, one of our legacy attendants of 25 years, saw what Mr. Newton did first-hand. She saw him completely pass up (pause) a triple letter, triple word play. And, what's worse, he did it on purpose! Betty confronted him and asked him what the hell he was doing. Mr. Newton shrugged it off. He said 'To me, QIS is not a real word' and he completely shrugged it off. Like it was no big deal. Like it was some—some video game. I spend more time playing WWF than time with my own kids, and for someone with Cam's opportunities in life to just—just dismiss QIS because he doesn't feel it's really a word? Who does he think he is? Earth to Cam, it's (expletive) WWF. We're not curing cancer here. Screw the damn honor code!! Quite frankly, its a direct slap in the face to anyone who plays the gamete right way. I'm proud of Betty and our airline to stand up to these 'people' who think they are better than the rest of the world. The world who have the opportunities to play Xi and score 34 points, but voluntarily choose not to. It (expletive) pisses me off." The day after his rant was made public, Kearney was fired immediately.

Munch's Hunch: Go Cam Go! Go Panthers!

Stunt Dad Diatribe: The Falcons are in deep trouble as they face a hot Panther team and have been up and down all season. However, Cam Newton is good, but won't be good enough on Sunday. The veteran Falcon team will come together and make one final push for the playoffs. Roddy White will be a mega-force with +100 yards and 2 touchdowns in this week's Southern Gumbo Bowl. Falcons cage Panthers 34-28.

The Late Game
Match-Up: Chicago (7-5) at Denver (7-5)
Preview: Chicago Bears defense not playing until 4th quarter. "We are playing the odds," said Pro Bowl linebacker Lance Briggs. "And going off their track record, we feel we can squeeze in some sightseeing for the first three quarters, then show up in the 4th. Heck, I've always wanted to try snowboarding." Cornerback Charles Tillman is taking a different approach, "Those guys (Briggs) are crazy. They are going to be exhausted with all that physical activity. I'm going to lay low in my hotel room and just get high. Like really, really high. I mean, its Denver, what else is there to do but get high?" While players are finding other things to do than to get high, from lunching at the original Chipotle to learning how to Hackey Sack, there is surprising little concern about the Broncos playing against absolutely no defense for three quarters. Head Coach Lovie Smith endorsed the mindset, "We all know that God only cares about the 4th quarter. It's evident in evey game Tebow plays in. No one likes to watch a blowout, not even the big guy upstairs. He'll keep it close, and its up to us to win the last 15 minutes of the game." Coach Smith said he was considering checking out the newest Mission Impossible movie which opened Friday.
Munch's Hunch: Daddy's gonna be at this game. Go Bears!
StuntDad Diatribe: The Bears are hurting. No Cutler. No Forte. No chance. Caleb Hanie has thrown for more interceptions than first downs in the past two games. I'm no statistician, but that doesn't bode well. Meanwhile, "Touched by an Angel (and thankfully not by his college coach) Tim Tebow has led the Broncos to a 6-1 record and captured the attention of the entire NFL. The Broncos defense has repeatedly bailed out the only man who can 'touch MC Hammer' and will doso again in this week's Mile High Bowl. Broncos hibernate Bears 24-21.

The Night Game Match-Up: New York Giants (6-6) at Dallas (7-5)

Preview: Tony Romo offering millions to change Sunday's date. He begged the Dallas Post. He pleaded with Governor Rick Perry. He appealed to President Obama. But, alas—his efforts to date have gone in vain. What could be so important you ask? The answer is the date of Sunday's night's game between the NY Giants and Dallas Cowboys. December 11. 2011. No, this has nothing do with some bizarre tie to 9/11. It has everything to do with that word. That terrible, horrible, no good, very bad word. A word so terrifying that it makes Tony Romo tumble, fumble, and crumble under pressure. Say it with me now: De-cem-ber. Sends a chill down your spine just looking at it, doesn't it? Well, it does more than that to Tony—in fact, it downright removes his spine altogether. Yanks right out of his back. It's a word that has caused Romo to go 7-10 during the most critical month of the year, just after the month of November when has a record of 19-2. As the Cowboys look to hang on to first place against the rival Giants, its been reported that Romo has been calling anyone and everyone to change the date of Sunday's game. "He called in absolute hysterics, babbling about changing Sunday's date to November 11, 2011.—just for the day," noted Presidential Secretary, Patti Gillroy. " He sounded like a damn heyna. It was the desperate act of a desperate man." Several anonymous sources have reported that he offered $1 million dollars to Rick Perry's presidential campaign as well as naming rights to his unborn girl. Romo was quoted as saying, "We are expecting a baby girl next year, but I'm not opposed to naming her Rick Romo if need be."

Munch's Hunch: Rick Perry is a weirdo. Go Cowboys!
Stunt Dad Diatribe: December, December, December and Tony Romo. Giants overpower Cowboys in this week's Short But Simple Bowl. Giants lasso Cowboys 28-27.

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Munch's Hunches: NFL Week 13

In Week 12, Munch continued his winning ways by going 2-1 and is riding that confidence into Week 13. Some of his fellow daycare classmates are concerned that his hot streak might be going to his head as 3-year old, Dimitri Stephanopoulos reported that Munch "bet the world" that he would run the table this week. "He bet all 12 kids at Darling Angels daycare that he would win all 3 games this week. Quite frankly, he's getting a little too cocky. I saw his picks - Denver is overrated, Baltimore is inconsistent, and he's one Pick 6 away from New Orleans getting sacked in the Superdome." Apparently, if Munch wins all 3 games, he gets a 12-pack of rice pudding. If he loses just one game, Munch is on diaper detail for the entire week. While most of the group shares Dimitri's sentiments about Munch, 2-year old Alexis Huntington sighed when she said, "I think he's dreamy."

The Saturday Stuntline is shaping up as...

The Early Game

• Match-Up: Denver (6-5) at Minnesota (2-9)
• Preview: 6th Grader more excited to see Son of God than beloved Vikings. Joey Mintz, a 12 year old living in a suburb of Minneapolis, can simply not wait for Sunday's game between the Broncos and his beloved Vikings. "I love my Vikings, don't get me wrong, but when will I ever get the chance to see the Son of God again—and, see him playing football nonetheless," said Mintz. "We go to church every Sunday, and we talk about Jesus saving this person and that person. Now, to have the chance to watch him save a city, a fallen franchise, and a coach's career—that truly is the work of our Lord, isn't it?" Richard Mintz, Joey's father, is not quite as enthused, but shares some of his son's Tebow-love. "Joseph's mother and I divorced 6 years ago. I don't go to church with them. I lost my job at the mill last year. And, I'm a raging alcoholic. But—if some chubby, God-toutin', spikey haired kid can put on a pair of shoulder pads, pretend he's a quarterback, and rattle of 4 wins in a row for a team that Josh McDaniels assembled, then maybe—just maybe—there is hope for me. I don't believe in God, but I guess I'm starting to believe in Tim Tebow."
• Munch's Hunch: Tebow spelled backwards is God. Go Broncos!
• StuntDad Diatribe: The Broncos have a better road record than they do at home. Their running game is solid and the defense has been stingy. And, Tim Tebow is 5-1 as a starter. We'd be fools not to pick them, right? Wrong. The Vikings are bad, actually they are horrible, but their defense is ok. Especially against the run. Every game against Tim Tebow has been Super Bowls for defenses, and this week we are going to see a rejuvenated Vikings team play like they have never played all season. Adrian Peterson's absence will be missed, but look for Toby "White Power" Gerhart to have a monster game in this week's Who's Your God Bowl. Vikings spear Broncos 24-21.

The Late Game

• Match-Up: Baltimore (8-3) at Cleveland (4-7)
• Preview: Cleveland Mayor encourages city to let their dogs out. Mayor Frank G. Jackson issued a tweet at 12:30am on Tuesday morning suggesting that Cleveland dog owners should let their canines loose on the streets of the city immediately after Sunday's kick-off against the Ravens. Jackson's tweet read, "@ 4:06pm on Sunday, let your mothaf@#$ dogs out Cleveland!" Since the tweet, nearly 5,000 residents have expressed both confusion and concern to City officials. "It's always a week from hell when Frank starts drinking during Monday Night Football," said the Mayor's secretary, Patti Gillroy. "PETA has called every (expletive) day. The Felines of the Flats Social Society is now planning a +250 dog parade down 4th street. And, the Cleveland's Women Journal took out a half-page ad in the city paper running a new "Boot the Boys Sunday" campaign, prompting wives to kick their husbands out of their houses at 4:06pm sharp." City treasurer, Tweed Bindle, added, "Frank doesn't realize the influence his tweets have on this city. This summer, when the Indians were in first place, the Yankees were coming into town for the weekend. He tweeted, "Scalp the yanks this weekend! Go Tribe!" and we ended up with 150 homicides in just 3 days." The 65 year old mayor has since handed over control of his Twitter account to his management team, stating on his blog Friday morning, "Up until today, I have posted virtually everyone of my tweets on my own, but clearly the platform has become too big to be managed by a single individual. While I will continue to express myself through @chocolatethunder, I'm turning the management of the feed over to my team at Big Dog Media to ensure the quality of its content."
• Munch's Hunch: No harming doggies. Go Ravens!
• StuntDad Diatribe: Each of the Ravens 3 losses have come against subpar teams following really big wins. On Thanksgiving, Baltimore showed the NFL they are for real by manhandling the 49ers. This Sunday, they will show the NFL that they are a fluke. They have the defense, but I don't like Joe Flacco. He has looked miserable against a lot of bad teams, and now he'll be facing the league's 6th best defense. Plus, Colt McCoy has never beaten any team in his division (0-6), which means he's due. I like the Browns running game, whether its Ogbonnaya or Hillis, to run all over a defense that won't have Ray Lewis. Look for a major upset in this week's Dogfight Bowl. Browns bite Ravens 21-17.

The Night Game

• Match-Up: Detroit (7-4) at New Orleans (8-3)
• Preview: Referee requests not to work Sunday Night Football game. 61 year old Ed Hochuli reportedly called Roger Goodell to ask the commissioner if someone else could referee Sunday night's game between the Detroit Lions and New Orleans Saints. "I've been running up and down NFL fields for nearly 20 years, but give me a break here," said Hochuli. "These teams go back and forth quicker than Jim Boeheim answering questions about Bernie Fine. I asked Commissioner Goodell to show a little compassion. My family will be watching. I've got two teenage boys for God's sake! Do they really need to see their father throwing up on the sidelines after each touchdown?" University of Iowa graduate assistant and long-time Hochuli fan, Chad Buckley, would also like to see the muscular referee be assigned to a different game. "During my darkest days this year as an Iowa Hawkeye football fan, Ed Hercules has inspired me to be a better me. I would ask myself over and over, 'What Would Ed Hochuli do?' I've done my best to give more long winded explanations of simple events which are obvious to everyone and you know what? It feels great. There is no greater joy to me these days than to ramble aimlessly, knowing people don't really give a crap about what I'm saying," said the 28 year old Buckley. "Give him the Jets/Skins game. They can't pass worth a lick and no one is going to watch that game anyways."
• Munch's Hunch: Mumbo jumbo, me likey gumbo. Go Saints!
• StuntDad Diatribe: Touchdowns, touchdowns, touchdowns! This game will be a red zone lovers dream as two of the most explosive offenses go head-to-head. It's a shame that Ndamukong Suh won't be playing, but honestly—would it really have mattered? Drew Brees is going to carve up the Lions defense regardless as I expect nothing less than 4 touchdown passes from him. The only question is whether Matt Stafford can throw 5? I don't see it happening, but I do see a passing extravaganza, with both teams combining for nearly 800 yards through the air. However, I don't think Detroit will have enough in the tank in this week's Big Easy Shootout Bowl. Saints cage Lions 44-38.

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Munch's Hunches: NFL Week 12

Whether it was a renewed focus or saving up for Christmas present shopping, Munch absolutely crushed in Week 11 by going 3-0. Munch was especially proud of picking the Eagles over the Giants in New York, who most of the world gave up on after learning that Michael Vick was going to be out. Philadelphia were underdogs at getting 5 points from their NFC East rival, but that's exactly why Munch picked them. He later admitted to placing a side bet with Tracy Sims, a fellow Darling Angels day care kiddie, who Munch was already in debt to her for: a Finding Nemo DVD, a copy of Goodnight Moon (1st Edition), and three Vanilla Jell-O Puddings. The crafty 18-month old Munch used a classic "Double or Nothing" by taking the Eagles who went on to win 17-10. Tuesday night was a good night in the Stunt Pete household when I came home to see Munch sitting on the couch reading Goodnight Moon. The kid is almost ready for Vegas.

The Saturday Stuntline is shaping up as...

The Early Game

• Match-Up: Houston (7-3) and Jacksonville (3-7)
• Preview: Janitor saves Matt Leinart in shower stall. With a season ending injury to quarterback Matt Schaub, the Houston Texans have tabbed Matt Leinart as their starting QB1. Leinart has not started a game in 3 years and didn't take a single snap last year. Which might help to explain why janitor Earl Duchamp stumbled upon Leinart in the Texans locker room shower early Tuesday morning. "I'm there every morning, 6am sharp. I start at the shower stalls because who knows what coaches and athletes do in there after hours. It can get pretty messy," said Duchamp. "I found Mr. Leinart huddled in the stall's corner with all sorts of basic football gear: socks, shin guards, jock strap. He seemed clueless what do with them and started cussing words that made me blush, and I clean up sh*t for a living! I asked if Mr. Leinart needed help, and he looked up at me with teary eyes and slowly nodded his head. And, that's when I saw it." What Duchamp saw was a 1973 instruction manual titled: How to Put On Shoulder Pads. Duchamp did what anyone of us would do in that situation. He sprung into action, placing the shoulder pads firmly on Leinart's shoulders, and clipping in the two shoulder straps. He finished in just under five seconds, leaving the befuddled quarterback in awe. Texans faithful should remember the name Earl Duchamp, because he not only saved Matt Leinart from certain embarrassment, but maybe—just maybe—the Texans' season all together.
• Munch's Hunch: Poo-poo is funny, Go Texans!
• StuntDad Diatribe: Leinart is a loser. C'mon, the guy had Larry Fitzgerald and Anquan Boldin and still couldn't amount to a starting quarterback in fantasy football. Even with the return of Andre Johnson, Leinart is a curse to any football team, and will drag them down quicker than Jerry Sandusky on a teenage boy. Blaine Gabbert, the Jaguars' rookie QB, should outperform Leinart, which is pathetic because Gabbert is—in a word—horrible. This game will be ugly, but Jacksonville will pull it out behind an incredible performance by Maurice Jones-Drew and a solid defensive effort in this week's Winning Ugly Bowl. Jaguars spur Texans 17-10.

The Late Game

• Match-Up: Chicago (7-3) at Oakland (6-4)
• Preview: Caleb Hanie to miss Modern Warfare Tournament. After winning their 5th straight game, the Chicago Bears have the entire Windy City thinking playoffs. Everyone, except Caleb Hanie. Hanie will be taking over the starting quarterback job from Jay Cutler, who broke his throwing thumb in Sunday's win over San Diego. Hanie addressed the media on Tuesday, admitting to some shocking revelations in the process. "The Call of Duty: Modern Warfare Annual Tournament is Monday morning in New York City. And for us gamers, it's our Super Bowl. I've spent my entire Bears career preparing for this moment," said Hanie. "While everyone else has been studying film or learning the playbook to make themselves better football players, I've been mastering my Killstreak & the streets of major European cities. I'm really ticked off that I have to start, as I had actually planned on using a sick day for Sunday's game in Oakland. I had it pretty thought-through: fly into JFK Sunday night, eat a hearty steak at Bistro Laurent Tourondel, sink into a comfy bed at the Benjamin Hotel, breakfast at The Grey Dog’s Coffee, and the start killing some Afghanis at 9am. But noooooo—now I have to get on a stupid plane, to a stupid city, and play a stupid football game. This ruins everything. My life—is ruined." Coaches and teammates alike were shocked by Hanie's admissions. Coach Lovie Smith responded by saying, "All of the crouching and rolling around on the sidelines, I thought it was some kind of sack avoidance thing he picked up at Colorado State. He's had us all fooled."
• Munch's Hunch: Video games are fun. Go Bears!
• StuntDad Diatribe: The Bears 5 game win streak will be coming to an end on Sunday. While Chicago has won 2 phases (defense and special teams) in nearly every game they played this year, their offense had been inconsistent for the first half of the season. Now Cutler goes down and they will be screwed for the first couple of games with Hanie under snap. Oakland has its own issues: McFadden is ruled out and their receiving core is battling injuries. However, Carson Palmer will continue to air it out against a defense that gives up a ton of yards through the air in this week's Black and Blue Bowl. Raiders rob Bears 24-17.

The Night Game

• Match-Up: New York Giants (6-4) at New Orleans (7-3)
• Preview: Eli Manning never spending holidays with brother Peyton again. On Thursday night, former New Orleans Saints quarterback Archie Manning, and the father of NFL quarterbacks Peyton and Eli, hosted the 1st, and apparently last, Manning Thanksgiving Dinner. Archie was very excited at the dinner because it was going to the be the first year that both kids would be available during the holidays. "Eli was in town for Sunday's game and Peyton doesn't have much else to do these days," said Archie, referring to Peyton's season-ending injury. "However, when we sat down for dinner and Peyton was handed the mashed potatoes, I knew that it would be a disaster. A total (expletive) disaster." It was reported that Peyton started his wacky audibling before passing the dish to Eli's wife, which really annoyed Eli. "I found it to be very disrespectful, because Abby doesn't like cold mashed potatoes, and his (expletive) antics took nearly 15 minutes," said Eli. "He's sitting there making obscene hand gestures in front of my children, yelling—literally yelling—in my wife's ear about Blue 42, and repeatedly slamming his knee up and down underneath the (expletive) table. He damn near spilled the gravy, which is completely (expletive) unacceptable." Peyton refused to alter this dinner approach which resulted in booing and cuss words from the entire Manning family, even his own children. His oldest summed up his father pretty well, "Sometimes, Dad can be a real ass."
• Munch's Hunch: Me no likey spilled gravy. Go Saints!
• StuntDad Diatribe: The Giants are in another 2nd half of the season funk as they look nothing like a team that is a game out of 1st place. They have lost two in a row and were humiliated against a dysfunctional Eagles team last week. On the other hand, the Saints are rested from a bye week, the Superdome will be louder than , and Drew Brees is on an absolute tear. Giants will be sent packing early as New Orleans should have this wrapped up before halftime in this week's Life's a Brees Bowl. Saints march on Giants 33-14.

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Munch's Hunches: NFL Week 11

Perhaps distracted by the arrival of his new sister, Munch finished a disappointing 1-2 in Week 10. This led to the a father-son talk on how best to handle distractions, specially with his love for gambling. I identified some critical do's and dont's that the little guy can take with him for life. The most important thing Munch should remember is to bet with the head, not the heart. I know he thinks that Indians are the coolest thing ever, but they happen to be two of the worst teams in football (KC and Washington). And, the one thing I told Munch never to do—is bet his sister. His eyes widened when he saw her for the first time, and I know, that somewhere in that head of his, he was thinking—is she worth 5 G.I. Joes or 10?

The Saturday Stuntline is shaping up as...

The Early Game

• Match-Up: Cincinnati (6-3) at Baltimore (6-3)
• Preview: Andy Dalton experiences mistaken identity. With the NFL obsession over the likes of Tim Tebow and Cam Newton, rookie Bengal quarterback, Andy Dalton, is feeling ignored more than ever. "I got into Baltimore on Wednesday for some early sightseeing and walked into a bar. Everyone pointed at me and immediately asked for my autograph. When I started signing, people kept asking me who Andy Dalton was, " said, Andy Dalton. "The bartender pulled me aside, apologized, and then told me that 'any red-haired, white guy who walks into the bar gets mistaken for Richie Cunningham.' I told the bartender that I didn't know who Richie Cunningham is, but to add that name to the list of quarterbacks that I hate." Dalton has nearly 20,000 followers on his "NFL Quarterbacks I'd Beat the Crap Out Of" Twitter feed. Each week Dalton nominates one quarterback and details how he literally would mess them up in a dark alley. For fun, we polled the 20,000 followers and asked them who they thought Andy Dalton was. We even showed them a picture of Andy in his Bengal jersey. Still, nearly 95% responded with, "Mike McQueary."
• Munch's Hunch: I don't like Gingers. Go Ravens!
• StuntDad Diatribe: Andy Dalton and the Bengals are on a mission. I have no idea who Andy Dalton is, but his name always appears whenever I search the Cincinnati Bengals, so maybe he's a coach or something. At any rate, Marvin Lewis has done well against his former team, winning 9 out of the past 13, and will take advantage of a Ray-Lewis-Less Raven defense by throwing, throwing and throwing. This will be the win that puts the Bengals on the map this year by shocking the Ravens in this week's Who's Andy Dalton Bowl. Bengals claw Ravens 21-20.

The Late Game

• Match-Up: Tennessee (5-4) at Atlanta (5-4)
• Preview: Roddy White's grandmother a no-show for weekly Bingo Night. Two weeks after rookie Falcon wide receiver Julio Jones torched the Indianapolis Colts for 131 yards and 2 touchdowns, Dolores White, the grandmother of Falcon wideout Roddy White, is still avoiding the Tuesday Bingo Night at the local rotary club. "She came in here two weeks, hootin' and hollerin' about that damn son of hers, catching balls, scoring touchdowns, " says fellow Bingo player Marla Johnson. "Rick Petersen finally stood up and told her that it was Julio Jones who was catching those touchdowns and not Roddy. Well, of course, sh*t hit the fan and she became hysterical, until ol' Rick showed her the front page of the newspaper." Rick noted the similarities between the two players: tall, wide receiver, dreadlocks, but Dolores remained unconvinced. When Rick also pointed out that the name on the back of the jersey read Jones, and not White, Dolores snapped before storming out of the building, "They probably switched jerseys at halftime, you damn fool." Ah yes, the old jersey switcheroo—a Mike Smith classic. Dolores has not been seen or heard from since.
• Munch's Hunch: Switcheroo is a fun word to say. Go Falcons!
• StuntDad Diatribe: I think we are going to witness a CJ2K coming out party. He finally cracked the +100 yard mark last week, the first time in a long time, and I wouldn't be surprised if he neared 200 yards rushing with a couple of touchdowns. Atlanta is a complete mess after losing last week to the Saints in overtime and Matt Ryan is not the quarterback he was a year ago. AFC beats NFC in this week's Confederate Bowl. Titans spear Falcons 30-28.

The Night Game

• Match-Up: Philadelphia (3-6) at New York Giants (6-3)
• Preview: Vince Young asked coach to "Tebow" the game plan. When Michael Vick announced that he could barely walk on Wednesday, it was assumed that Vince Young would be taking over as QB1 against the New York Giants on Sunday night. When Young was made aware of this, he apparently had a sit down with coach Andy Reid to discuss how they can tweak the game plan to better suit his skills, like Denver did with Tim Tebow. Young is best known for scoring a 6 on his Wonderlic test—one of the questions read, "In your own words, describe what a quarterback means to you" and Vince's answer was "a refund." Due to the challenges Vince has with intelligence, he reportedly asked Coach Reid to "dumb down" the playbook, specifically asking that all plays that involve him be limited to hiking the ball and letting him read the defense. Reid reportedly drew several x's and o's on a blackboard to get a sense of Vince's reads on defenses and the quarterback looked at Reid and said, "I love you too, Coach."
• Munch's Hunch: I'm all about the love, Go Eagles!
• StuntDad Diatribe: No Michael Vick, no chance for the Eagles. To go 3-6 with one of those most talented teams in the league is an embarrassment. Their star receiver was benched for missing a team meeting. They lost to Arizona—at home. Can you say rock bottom? Meanwhile, Eli has his Giants winning 3 out the past 4, including a game last week against SF that they should have won. The Giants defense will bull rush Vince Young and send him scrabbling for Prozac in this week's Beasts of the East Bowl. Giants medicate Eagles 28-10.

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Munch's Hunches: NFL Week 10

One step forward, two steps back. Munch dropped 2 out of 3 games in Week 9, but insists it had nothing to do the amount of time spent gambling and playing poker at daycare. Because of his disappointing weekend, I felt it was time to have "the talk." The talk every father has with their son about identifying a 4 year old girl's tell, reiterating that it's never safe to bluff more stuffed animals that you can't afford to lose, and when you're dealt pocket aces—try not to giggle and under no circumstances, never wet your diaper. While his Texas Hold 'em focus has benefited from our sit down, let's hope it carries over to Sunday.

The Saturday Stuntline is shaping up as...

The Early Game

• Match-Up: New Orleans (6-3) at Atlanta (5-3)
• Preview: Drew Brees' mole is interfering with the Dirty Bird dance. During Wednesday's press conference, quarterback Drew Brees confirmed that the birthmark on his right check was prohibiting the flapping of his right arm to act like a wing. "I really like the idea of showing up the other team anyway possible, and I thought this could really piss off Roddy White," said Brees, "Turns out this damn mole keeps preventing full wing flappage." Brees then raised his arm to demonstrate the issue and everyone in the room cringed at the sound of it. A reporter later compared it to scrapping roadkill off the pavement. Several Saints trainers also agreed and confirmed that Brees can expect severe chaffing of the forearm if he continues his attempt to master this dance. One trainer explained, "That thing on his face—it's friggin' disgusting. Like a damn turd that will never flush. He keeps practicing that ridiculous dance and his arm—or his face—is going to fall off by halftime."
• Munch's Hunch: Me no likey poopy on faces. Go Falcons!
• StuntDad Diatribe: New Orleans playing with a chip on its shoulder since losing to St. Louis two weeks ago and they will come out firing against Atlanta. Darren Sproles is finally being used in the right system and should have a monster game catching dump-offs from Brees and running wild on a weak Falcon linebacker unit. If the Saints can make Atlanta pass early and abadone Michael Turner, consider the Falcons clipped in this week's Southern Shootout Bowl. Saints Go Marching On The Falcons, 34-31.

The Late Game

• Match-Up: Detroit (6-2) at Chicago (5-3)
• Preview: Brian Urlacher quits his 2nd job as a private dancer. After Monday's shocking win over the Philadelphia Eagles, the Chicago Bears found themselves back in the NFC playoff hunt, which—for Brian Urlacher—caused the star middle linebacker to quit his night job at Larry's Sugar Shack. "After we lost to the Lions last month, we knew we hit rock bottom as at team. Losing to them is a lot like the male escort business. Once you go down, there's really no looking up after that," said Urlacher. "Each year at this time, a few guys always hang up their cleats and look for additional sources of income. Jay Cutler was a spokesman for Nut Liquor last year and even Mike Martz was a stand-in for Robin Williams as Mrs. Doutbfire the year before that." The owner of Larry's Sugar Shack, Lawrence Wilson, confirmed Urlacher's departure while also adding, "Our door is always open. I don't discriminate against starting players or bench players. If you can dance, you will dance. And, you can't beat the pay: 15 bucks an hour and free buffets. I'll tell you though, those football players sure can eat!" Although Larry acknowledges his business booms as more NFLers show up, he also admits to taking large hits on pork and beef sales.
• Munch's Hunch: I love anything sugar! Go Bears!
• StuntDad Diatribe: Beating the Eagles in Philly, on Monday night, after some struggling games will give the Bears so much momentum that Detroit won't have a chance. Last time these teams met, Jhavid Best went nuts. He is ruled out and with it, go any chance the Lions have against the streaking Bears in this week's Cage Match Bowl. Bears maul Lions 27-17.

The Night Game

• Match-Up: New England (5-3) at New York Jets (5-3)
• Preview: Vince Wilfolk already misses his buddy Albert. On Wednesday morning, the New England Patriots cut one-time Pro Bowler Albert Haynesworth, causing great sadness with Patriot defensive lineman Vince Wilfolk. "I will definitely miss him. In the six games that he actually played in, he served as a tremendous distraction. Belicheck told him, 'When they hike the ball, don't move, don't say nothin, and show absolutely zero effort.' Teams would think that an overpaid, overweight, overhyped guy like Al would actually make a difference. That's why Bill is a genius. He forced the big fella to be lazy, uninterested, and just all around pathetic, and it worked. Got me two sacks against Miami!" Wilfolk said. Upon hearing this, Rex Ryan told reporters, "That probably explains OchoCinco's performance, guess I have a lot to learn when it comes to strategy." Ryan later confessed that under no circumstances whatsoever is any Jet to guard OchoCinco, even if he's in the end zone. "Looks like Bill isn't the only one who knows football strategy."
• Munch's Hunch: J-E-T-S! J-E-T-S! J-E-T-S!
• StuntDad Diatribe: Both teams have been horribly inconsistent and sometime look like playoff teams and bottom feeders the other. Tom Brady will conduct an air assault on a below average Jets team. Look for Wes Welker to own the Jets as their corners won't be able to guard the quick ins and outs that make Welker such a threat. The running game for the Jets will continue to struggle and the offense simply isn't good enough in this Who's For Real Bowl. Patriots ground Jets 38-21.

Now, we turn to StuntDad Nation on your thoughts on these and other games from around the league.

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Munch's Hunches: NFL Week 9

Week 8 resulted in two things: the Return of the Munch as he correctly guessed 2 out of the 3 games, but the loss of $45 in toys. For each correct guess, we have been rewarding Munch with a Star Wars action figure. However, it wasn't until this past Wednesday, when I noticed that Chewy, Jango, Dooku, Luke (Jedi version) and Han (Empire version) were missing. When I asked Wifey, she sighed and muttered, "Daycare." Apparently, my son has commandeered a corner of the daycare's play area into a mini-Bellagio. A toy workbench serves as a poker table, Plants vs. Zombies toys are used to replicate the Botanical Gardens, and he's convinced two girls to rhythmically shoot squirt guns in the air while humming Frank Sinatra. With Munch, Wifey and I have either assured him of a earning an invitation from the World Series of Poker or Intervention—or both.

The Saturday Stuntline is shaping up as...

The Early Game

• Match-Up: NY Jets (4-3) at Buffalo (5-2)
• Preview: The New York Jets aren't sure why they need to actually play on Sunday. Following their bye week, the New York Jets expressed confusion over having to travel to Buffalo this weekend. "I hope this is another one of Coach Ryan's goofy pranks, like the time he made us all practice barefoot during two-a-days, because a lot of these guys really liked sleeping in last Sunday," said quarterback Mark Sanchez, helping teammates onto their bus and gently escorting each of them to their assigned seat. "I bet, as we roll into Buffalo, Coach will try to actually get us off the bus. But—we are not going to let him. No way, no how. We love our Sunday mornings. And besides, it's the Bills." When it was mentioned that Buffalo was favored by 1.5 points, Mark laughed and rolled his eyes. "You guys are silly. Let me guess, they are in first place too?"
• Munch's Hunch: I'm all about the Benjamins baby. Go Bills!
• StuntDad Diatribe: Despite all of their losses coming on the road this year, their is too much at stake for the Jets to lose this one and too much pressure on Rex Ryan. Losing to the Bills will be devastating and likely ruin the Jets' playoff hopes. Look for the Jets to slow this game down, by running, running, and running the ball. Shonn Greene and LT will have big days against a poor run defense. And, Ryan Fitzpatrick will finally show the world two things: 1) why Harvard quarterbacks don't belong in the NFL and 2) why he's not worth $60 million ($60 million!!!!!!!) in this week's Pound the Ground Bowl. Jets trample Bills 28-17.

The Late Game

• Match-Up: Green Bay (7-0) at San Diego (4-3)
• Preview: Aaron Rodgers is furious with his own teammates. Sunday will be Rodgers' first regular season start against any team in his native state, but even the Super Bowl MVP is having a hard time securing ticket requests for family and friends. "For whatever reason, a lot of my 'so-called teammates' have requested tons of tickets, and they're not even from here. I'm disappointed, they know how much I like to show off for my mom," said Rodgers. "I love Greg Jennings and all, but he requested 2o tickets. He's from Michigan. Who the hell can he possibly know in California?" During Thursday's flight to San Diego, it was reported that Rodgers walked from player to player, jotting down their hometown and ticket request amounts. Additionally, Rodgers was overheard complaining to coach Mike McCarthy, "Coach, look at this. Lawrence Guy. Rookie. Defensive end. Requested 50 tickets! He's from Vegas for God's sake." McCarthy quietly informed Aaron that Guy's hometown was actually closer than Rodgers' (Chico, CA) by about 4 hours. For the remainder of the day, Rogers could be seen pouting in the hotel lobby wearing only the gold heavyweight championship belt that his 'teammates' gave him after winning the Super Bowl. Rodgers finally perked up a few hours later after learning the Packers cut Guy and gave Aaron half of the former lineman's tickets.
• Munch's Hunch: Surfs up San Diego. Go Pack Go!
• StuntDad Diatribe: Winning on the road in the NFL is tough. Winning on the road to a good team is even tougher, especially when your team's pass defense ranks near the bottom. Philip Rivers is poised to have a bounce back game and torch the Packers secondary. This should be a high scoring affair with both QBs reaching the +300 yard mark and 3 TDs each in this week's Top Gun Bowl. Chargers edge Packers 34-31.

The Night Game

• Match-Up: Baltimore (5-2) at Pittsburgh (6-2)
• Preview: Terrell Suggs got beaten up—by own his lips. After an overly excessive week of trash talking, the lips of Terrell Suggs had enough, as the star linebacker was forced to check into a Baltimore hospital to treat multiple wounds to the face. When pressed by the police, Suggs' lips said, "First he makes me announce that Sunday's match-up between the Ravens and Steelers will make the world stop. Then, I'm forced to say that it will make everyone's piss hot. And finally, I’m pressed to tell reporters that I have Ben Roethlisberger's ass in a mini-fridge down in the basement. How much crap did I have to put up with before I cracked?" The medical report indicates Terrell's lips became immensely swollen due to an allergic reaction to complete and utter bullshit, which allowed the lips to repeatedly slap their owner several times across the face, rendering the linebacker unconscious. No charges have been filed by the owner, although NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell has summoned both Terrell and his lips to discuss this matter in greater detail.
• Munch's Hunch: Whose burger is it? Roethlisberger's!
• StuntDad Diatribe: Baltimore is old news. In fact, at this point in time, when a NFL player brags they are from the "U", they have to be old right? Bryant Mt. McKinnie, 33. Ed Reed, 33. Ray Lewis, 36. They won their Super Bowl 10 years ago (thank you, ahem, John Kitna) and will never win one again in my lifetime. Pittsburgh, on the other hand, just keeps doing it right, year after year. Their always steller defense is now taking a back seat to Big Ben and a young, fast receiving core. Watch for Mike Wallace and Antonio Brown to run circles around what was once, a very good Baltimore defense in this Out-With-the-Old-In-With-the-New Bowl. Pittsburgh shuts up Baltimore 31-21.

Now, we turn to StuntDad Nation on your thoughts on these and other games from around the league.

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Munch's Hunches: NFL Week 8

Greetings StuntDad Nation and welcome to Week 8 of the NFL 2011 season.

Can two Raider quarterbacks throw 3 interceptions each, in the same game? Has Warners Bros. started casting for the soon-to-be made movie: "The Legend of Tim Tebow"? Did zero NFL teams not showing up to see his workout really drive Terrell Owens to attempt suicide?

Munch must have let his success in Week 6 go to his head, because he laid a big ol' goose egg in Week 7, which cost us an unfriendly visit from our bookie. Little did I know, Munch had made a hefty side bet on whether Chris Johnson would rush for more than 20 yards. After the loan shark left, taking Munch's brand new dump truck in the process to "cover the juice," Munch mumbled something that sounded like, "It was a sure thing, Dad." This became my first opportunity for a teachable moment. I explained to him that the only sure things in the NFL are: athletes with more gold teeth will always let you down and the Chicago Bears will always screw up their first round draft pick.

The Saturday Stuntline is shaping up as...

The Early Game

• Match-Up: Minnesota (1-6) at Carolina (2-5)
• Preview: Let's face it, the early games stink this week. 3 teams are winless, and 3 others only have 1 win. The lone bright spot in the first 6 is what's happening in Carolina as we travel down south to focus on one of the season's biggest surprises. Cam Newton has been the most scrutinized quarterback in history and has shut up every critic since Week 1. He has over 2,000 yards passing, including 3 games of +300 or more . He has already tied the record for most rushing touchdowns by a quarterback as a rookie (7). And, he is on pace to be the first quarterback since Jim Plunkett (1970) to have won the Heisman Trophy and not completely sucked. (I Stunt Dare you to argue this). It's crazy to think that Adrian Peterson won't be the best football player on this field, but if you were starting a football team tomorrow, would you rather have A-Pete or the Chosen One? 
• Munch's Hunch: My favorite fruit is Fig Newton. Go Panthers!
• StuntDad Diatribe: Right, and strawberry pop-tarts are MY favorite fruit, Kid. But, speaking of food, Adrian Peterson will man up and carve up a defense that has more holes in it than a doughnut shop. Mmmmmm, doughnuts. Look for A-Pete to score 3x and Christian Ponder to make everyone forget about the Donovan McNabb debacle. Cam Newton will light up the Vikes secondary and easily surpass 300 yards and Steve Smith will get his +100, but it won't be enough in this week's Super Stud Showdown Bowl. Vikings dunk the Cats 24-21.

The Late Game

• Match-Up: Detroit (4-2) at Denver (2-4)
• Preview: No city is more excited for Sunday than Denver, as they get to watch Timmy's first start of the season. Tebow-mania is at an all-time high and I can already think of the next great NFL drinking game: every time the cameras show a Bible passage relating to Tim Tebow,  one must take a shot! And speaking of shots, is anyone more excited to see Tim Tebow than Ndamukong Suh? Suh's been taking a lot of heat in the media this week for his face-mask take down and taunting of Matty Ice this past Sunday, so what better way to release a caged animal's anger and frustration than with fresh meat?
• Munch's Hunch: Kings of the jungle. RAAAARRR! Go Lions!
• StuntDad Diatribe: Taking the easy way out, Kid? I don't blame you. Detroit has lost two in a row, but the losing streak ends at Mile High. Matt Stafford will have a monster day and lead an air assault on a poor Denver defense. Megatron will add 2 more scores to his league leading touchdown total and the D-Line will have Tebow running scared all day. When I look at this match-up I see Tebow vs. Suh. Good vs. Evil. Superhero vs. Villain. I usually don't like to watch blow-outs, but it will be fun to watch  in this week's Comic Book Bowl. Detroit crushes Denver 44-17.

The Night Game

• Match-Up: Dallas (3-3) at Philadelphia (2-4)
• Preview: These teams are better than their records and while its still early in the season, the loser of this game could find themselves in trouble, especially Philly. The Eagles are desperate for a win. Last year in Week 5, the Eagles needed a prime-time performance from Michael Vick in a prime-time game against the Redskins. Vick responded with 6 touchdowns, 5 in the first half. In another big-time performance, DeMarco Murray went off last week with 250 yards against the Rams, and should have another stellar game against an Eagle run defense that is giving up +120 yards a game. POP-QUIZ: only two other Cowboys have rushed for more than 200 yards in a game, can you name them?   
• Munch's Hunch: Who let the dogs out, woof-woof-woof-woof. Go Eagles!
• StuntDad Diatribe: Like the rest of the world, I see that winning cures all as the Canine Killer appears to be back in your good graces, Kid. Might I remind you that just a year ago, you wore a "Neuter #7" onesie when they came to Chicago last year. The only dogs being let out is going to be the Cowboy defense that will chase down and destroy Michael Vick. Philly's 12 consecutive wins after a bye-week comes to a screeching halt. And then we get to witness another Fan-Frenzy-Freak-Out by the Freaks in Philly. Look for fans to throw beers, brats, and batteries onto the field after their beloved Dream Team falls to 2-5. WEEEOOOWWWWWW!!!! Dallas sneaks out of town 31-28. 

Now, we turn to StuntDad Nation on your thoughts on these and other games from around the league. 

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Munch's Hunches: NFL Week 7

Greetings StuntDad Nation and welcome to Week 7 of the NFL 2011 season.

Are post-game fisticuffs between coaches more interesting than an actual football game? Did the Bengals get TWO 1st-Round draft picks for a washed up, 33 year old quarterback? Charles Barkley is now covering the NFL due to the NBA lockout—we already have Warren Sapp, do we really need another overweight mushmouth analyzing the weekly match-ups?

Well folks, Munch bounced back from a tough week 5 by going 2-1 in Week 6, and I firmly believe that a 66% winning percentage is good enough to start betting on higher learning educations. So, the Stunt Pete household is betting big this weekend. If at least two of his predictions below are correct this week, it looks like the little guy can punch his ticket to an already-paid-for university of his choice. If not, I'm going to have to go "Denzel Washington on him" and turn him into the next Jesus Shuttlesworth.

The Saturday Stuntline is shaping up as...

The Early Game

• Match-Up: San Diego (4-1) at NY Jets (3-3)
• Preview: Earlier this week, Rex Ryan ran his mouth to the world again. He stated that Norv Turner sucks as a coach by bragging to reporters that if San Diego had hired him in 2007, Ryan and the Chargers would have several Super Bowl Rings by now. This same world also knows that Rex is a douche and the only rings he'd have by now would be those from a Burger King value meal. However, this type of pre-game dissing might lead to another post-game "My Schwartz is Bigger Than Yours" incident. And, who wouldn't want to tune in just at the thought that someone might slug Rex Ryan right in the (pork) chops?
• Munch's Hunch: Coach Ryan looks like a piggy. Piggies play in poo-poo. Go Chargers!!!
• StuntDad Diatribe: Ok, kid—their coach is a turd, I'll give you that one. But, I think the bacon-cravin', feet-lovin', trash-talkin' widebody motivates his team to finally reach their potential this year to stun the Bolts on their home turf. This will be LaDainian Tomlinson's first game against the former team who decided not to give a 31 year old running back $8 million a year. Major props to Chargers owner AJ Smith, but be forewarned—LT is poised as a pig-in-s#$t for payback, and Mark Sanchez is said to have brought two cartons of hot dogs for the 4th quarter of this week's Lips and A$$holes Bowl. Gang Green oinks one out: 31-30.

The Late Game

• Match-Up: Houston (3-3) at Tennessee (3-2)
• Preview: Has it really been 14 years since the Houston Oilers moved to Nashville? My god, I was still in college. Tear. Enough with the nostalgia...In the preseason, this game was hyped around Johnson & Johnson. But, an injury will prevent Andre from playing, and money will prevent Chris from playing—well. How many times do we see player performance decline after he receives an insanely high contract extension? CJ2K is no exception as he has 53 million reasons why he should run out of bounds instead of turning up field. The chance for a 1st down coupled with the the thought of a seven-man pile on could cost him that G5 he and his buddies have their eyes on. However, this game will likely come Down to the Matt, as these two quarterbacks, Schaub and Hasselbeck, won't have their superstars to lean on. The Battle for the AFC South features two teams that are very evenly matched, with or without J&J, and should be a close one.
• Munch's Hunch: Coach's name is Munchak. Word. Go Titans!
• StuntDad Diatribe: I can respect the name bias Kid, but Tennessee is going to feel the wrath of the Arian Nation. Foster will go "2&2: with 200 all purpose yards and reach the endzone twice. Matt Schaub will have a solid game albeit forgetful game by having his own "2&2" game (+200 yrds passing, 2 touchdowns). Remember when Matt Schaub was thought to be the second coming of Joe Montana after throwing for 4,000 yards two seasons ago? He's actually starting to show his true colors as more of a, well—Matt Hasselbeck. But, it will be Hasselbeck who struggles against an underrated Texan secondary. In fact, I predict that after throwing 2 interceptions for the first time all season, the aging quarterback will finally admit in the post-game interview that he is just happy to still be on TV at this point of his career, in this week's Double Deuce Bowl. Houston "Remembers the Oilers" with a 28-24 win.

The Night Game

• Match-Up: Baltimore (4-1) at Jacksonville (1-5)
• Preview: Like last week, we flipped another quarter between the SNF and MNF games this week as both match-ups kind of blow. Two of the best (Baltimore and New Orleans) go up against two of the worst (Jacksonville and Indianapolis). We're stuck writing about this match-up and you're stuck reading about it.
• Munch's Hunch: Nomo Mojo — Go Ravens!
• StuntDad Diatribe: You got it, Kid. To make this game semi-entertaining, we are thinking that  a Prop Bet might make this fun: who gets knocked out of the game first: Maurice Jones-Drew or Blaine Gabbert. Mojo might be a rolling ball of butcher knives, but he will be pummeled by a defense who is old enough, smart enough, and dirty enough to clog the lanes on every down, in order to make Gabbert throw. While MJD takes the hard hits inside, my guess is that Chuck Pagano (D-Coordinator) will bring the noise on every play by blitzing Lewis and Suggs early and often on the rookie. Gabbert will get hurried, knocked down, and probably have his hair long, golden hair messed up in this week's Breaking Blaine Bowl. Ravens cage the Jags: 34-13.

Now, we turn to StuntDad Nation on your thoughts on these and other games from around the league. Likes, dislikes, hits, & misses?

- Not a parenting blog, not a daddy blog, not a mommy blog — it's a Stunt Dad blog.

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